Wednesday, January 18, 2012

scattered


Scatter me to the wind
Take my pieces to their destined place
For when they return
I will be whole once again



I have been so scattered lately. Routines I vowed to start with the New Year have fallen to the way side, chores have become neglected, new books lie unread, and projects remain half finished. My oldest said to me the other night, "We really need a night time routine mama, a fun one." He came up with it, within 5 minutes of suggesting a routine. He didn't need everything to be "just right" to start, everything was "just right" because he started. 

We also prayed that night for their Pajoe, my father. We held his face in our "brains" and prayed for his strength and recovery. Later we found out, that at the time of our prayers, my dad asked the nurse to see my mom. It was the first coherent  thing he has done since being admitted to the hospital. The Badger was floored! "I knew it, I knew it, I knew Pajoe would feel me."

I guess its ok to be scattered sometimes, as long as you trust in the process and are being present even when you feel your parts are all over the place. Only then, will you be able to see the guiding hand of a six year old, pulling your pieces back together and making you whole again. 

6 comments:

  1. Oh, this is beautiful! You have been in my thoughts, and I am so glad to hear that your dad is improving, even if it's only small signs like asking for your mom. I hope it brings you hope! So glad to know someone is holding you together in the midst of everything - it's definitely okay to be scattered!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Scattered is quite alright, especially with what you are going through. Just go with it right? So so so glad that your dad is showing positive signs!!! Thank goodness for our babes that help us remember to stay in the present.
    Much love and healing to your father my friend!!
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you dear friends, the kindness you both have shown me gives me much strength.

    ReplyDelete
  4. scattered can feel frightening, and as if nothing will ever make sense again. but it's also a time for things to come together in a different way i think.
    kids are little gurus.

    healing sent your father's way.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Lovely post - your oldest has that very beautiful Buddhist concept of; everything is perfect right now so start where you are. Gorgeous observation Mama Whiteelk.

    Love Katie x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Katie
      Your site has totally intrigued me! We try very much to incorporate Buddhist principles into our parenting. I look forward to learning much from your site!

      Delete

Thank you so much for bringing your energy! It fills me up to see your comments xoxo