rebirth

water to wine

rebirth can be liberating

or it can be uncomfortable as shit. 

                 cheers sisters

shed

doilies and drinking in life on a new porch. preparing for spring, oh the busyness. I feel it down deep, that energy just before growth. I have been planning and tilling and weeding and feeding. Crying, hugging, laughing and loving.

It was a hard winter. 

I made it through, stronger and grateful.  I'm ready to shed.

The old no longer fits, it is way too small.  

snow

We got snow this morning, just enough for a snowball. Not enough to cancel school.  Our weather has been so spastic, and not surprisingly, so have my days. I won't go there. Anyway, supposed to be in the upper 50's and sunny on Friday. Gonna be working in my neglected garden, build up some good karma, ya know? Try to ground myself, after all Spring Equinox is just around the corner. Yes, I think I will have another cup of close to perfect peppermint tea. It iiiss snowing outside.

Catching the morning sun with a special fella,
Oh how my heart swells.
Oh how my spirit soars,
catching the Momentness with a special fella.

Happy weekend, loves!

love

I loooove to love. 

Love, love, love to love. 

Authentic true, soul level love. 

So on this commercialized day of plastic, sugar, manufactured surface level love, I could easily get sick to my stomach. Except, I love to love. 

I love to see the word "LOVE" plastered on things. I love to see a clumsy burly teenager carrying a white bear and a balloon. Some people need the security of an organized holiday to show their heart.  I get that.

I kinda feel like Valentine's Day is like a big dance and everyone is doing the waltz. They got the right idea, but they are missing the point. So hell yeah, if there's a dance I am going, but Ima do my own thing. 

There is great possibility when the scared and unaware choose to celebrate love. I'm going to tune in and kick it up a notch! 

Much, much pure love to you today my friends!!! You are loved and appreciated on the deepest level. 

float

Cloud 9 came to my bedside at 5 am on Saturday . That rarely happens, so I totally skipped the slippers and hopped on. All morning I rode that cloud. Knowing that clouds thrive in the out of doors, I rode my cloud right out the backdoor and joined the chickens and other critters (some human some not) enjoying their Saturday.

The weather was surreal, 57 sunny and soft breeze. 

They walked and rode scooters over to cousins' for a cardboard zombie fight. I floated on my cloud watching in awe as my gifts led the way. I floated on my cloud as the sun warmed me to my core and allowed the breeze to carry my love and gratitude through the air to those in need.
Saturday I truly lived.

fly by

My weekend flew by. I knew it would, it was one of those packed full of doing from Friday through Sunday. There were snow flurries, visits with old high school basketball friends, fevers, thrift store scores, crayon making, heart knot tying and dances of course. It was fun, exhausting and productive. Ahhhhh....

rise

I hate to admit it, but the majority of my time is spent feeling buried. Either under a pile of laundry, bills, unfinished home and personal projects, fatigue, the list literally goes on and on. I am constantly clawing my way out of this hole dug by illness, young and instant family, you know life. I get so bogged I forget. I forget I have the tools to rise up. Music has always been magic, a tool that sparks my light in the darkest, deepest times and carries me to another place. Whether it's listening or playing I am always lifted. When I play, I feel "tapped in" to the Divine, the songs are not mine I am only the instrument. So I must play everyday. Period.

Oh snap!

"Oh snap" 

I hear the crocus say. 

"Winter, what? Its 68 degrees yo." 

I know what you are thinking, and yes I too was surprised that such a rural bloom could be so urban.

well

artwork by the Wolf

            I am well. I am dancing, we all are. This is our family jam, stuck on repeat...                                            

                                                 

               Won't you dance with us? 

callin in the light

enjoying their new yoga dvd

There are clouds and ice outside my window today, and I have been in the bed for day 2, probably a cold or perhaps a Chronic Fatigue flare up. Either way, I am visited sporadically by my light walkers. Hugs, waves, blown kisses are the best meds and I am soakin it up.

They have been enthralled in their new yoga dvd, asking to do it daily, sometimes more than once. It makes me happy, it brings me peace to hear them shout their affirmations.

Getting well, being strong, basking in the light that surrounds me. Those are my plans for the weekend.

 have a lovely weekend friends

"Don't worry, honey. We have a plan. Things get done with a plan." The look and tone reminded me I know what to do, move on. The cusp of plans and fruition has always been a place of uneasiness. Too much can "go wrong", be questioned.
He reminded me just like that to spend my energy in other places and find comfort in my faith. A faith that on my earth journey encourages and tugs at me like an eager babe intent on sharing an new experience.

 This weekend is looking to lend itself to coop building, recuperating, diving into to this blog, which I am sad to say I just found out about and maybe finish reading this book. 

old shed we are converting to coop

a note to help remind us. 

sending you all love and wishes for a weekend of just what you need xoxo

twas the weekend

The sun was enchanting. So we went outside. 

All of us. 

chicks in the loo

2013 rolled in

I in my pajamas

Spirits in mason jars

Toasting with Root beer

Babies asleep on couches.

Oh and chicks in my bathroom. 

This is going to be a great year. Love to you all!

cheep cheep

   There are things I feel I must write, I must say, I must do. Yet something about the timing seems off. I carry these words, thoughts and actions in my shoulders, they manifest. 

"Let it all go" I say. It does, for a while. 

Having new babies around helps. After almost 5 years, I finally got my chicks! Their "cheeps" are my prayer bowl  music right now and their presence is a total leap of faith. 

Joy pockets

joys

we have spent our days drawing and singing

The Wolf finished his first big kid book all by himself in one day

Shoulder rubs from the Owl while daddy's away

Daddy comes back tonight

joining Monica for joy pockets 

This time last year...

I was searching through my posts, reliving my year in blogland. A whole year! I can't believe it. Anyway, this is my post from Dec.6 2011. I still love the song as much as I did then.

Dec.6 2011

I heard this song for the first time the other day and helped me remember how I dream Christmas to be. It is sung by the great Perry Como (a family favorite) and apparently was in a movie The Odessa File a post Nazi war film, so it has a bit of a stigma. I however, don't associate it with the movie and think it is beautiful. Hope you do as well

Swirly

I believe one of my gifts this time is to see other's hearts. I am able to look past ego and see their pain. When I was younger, it really worked to my advantage. I used it many times to convince others of my plight. I was very powerful, not necessarily in a bad way, but my opinions held a lot of weight.

Then one summer, it shifted. I was 20 and I got very sick, I spent almost a year of my life in bed or a dr.'s office and scared. When I had recovered,  my gift of "sight" had strengthened, but my ability to use it as advantaged gone. I had little boundaries, and gave energy to those undeserving. I lost a lot of my power, no I gave it up. I was ashamed of my power.

Things are swirly for me now. I need my power more than ever. My babes need a Mama Brave. Who uses her instinct, her knowledge and gifts to blaze a trail as we walk our Earth journey together. There are strange and wonderful things happening here. There is much yelling, there is much singing. I hear both. I feel both. I pray my voice is the clearest.

Joy Pockets returns!

When I first started blogging one of the most inspiring sites was Monica's Holistic Mama. I finally found kindred mamas who question and strive for the same things I find important. It gave me so much validation in my mamahood path. Today after a long hiatus I 'm joining joy pockets again. Yay!!

My boys had a moment, a life lesson moment. A gifting that swells my soul so much I have been floating ever since. The Owl believes in being just and fair and when he feels he is being scammed a fierce hurt consumes him. The Wolf pushed too far and watched as his brother erupted in pain and anger. Typically when this happens, the Wolf rolls his eyes says "sorrryee" and leaves, this time he reached out to his brother and helped him realize the emotions swirling around them, and they took control of the situation. At 5 and 7 years old (and males)!!  After the resolution, the love shared between the two was unreal, angelic. Their dad said it was like a Love Potion #9 bomb exploded in the house. It was awesome.

Wishing you a calm and love soaked weekend xoxo

shine on

So, there's this book club comprised of my husband's extended female family and their friends, and I am a member. Oh and they are all Catholic and I am not. Now, I know some might think "why in the hell, would you choose to hang out socially with that crew?"

Well there are three good reasons.

 1. They love me AND my children very much and I love them.

 2. They are wonderful people

3. I don't have many friends and I have no friends in my town.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I do feel out of place. Our last book club I was corrected Global warming is not real; shit happens and it is cyclical. One time I learned African-Americans miss being slaves and that is why they stay on welfare. Oh and somehow we always end up talking about abortion. While most of the time I stand alone in my "bleeding heart" views, I am there. I am being a yin to their yang, and I believe that is so important. It makes some uncomfortable, talking about things such as religion, politics, human suffering, women's rights etc. So in order to prevent idle minds and mouths we are having a costume jewelry swap and the next meeting! 

I am totally stoked! Why on earth would I want to talk to other women about helping others or how the book at hand relates to present day society and how we can learn and grown from that when I could drink wine and get a new necklace!!!  

It is hard, being surrounded by those who think you are different, or who feel they must save you from your ignorance. Even harder, when those people's words or actions come from a dark place. I know. I don't get out much because of it. Yet I know the reason I am on this Earth is to keep my light shining,protected from situations and people who diminish it and to never dwindle another's. 

A kindred told me this morning "We can't always be the light bringers. Sometimes one needs to vent so we don't get consumed by the dark shit."  So I vented just a little bit. Thanks guys I feel so much brighter!